Product: Toby Keith in Omaha

Gist of copy: People would want to go see Toby Keith "perform" AND PAY FOR IT.

Response: It's like they dipped Enrique Iglesias in layer after layer of butter until he got all puffy. Then they made him sing bumper stickers over old Ray Stevens backing tracks.  It's too bad.  I kinda miss country music.

Product: Www.longandstrong.com (sic)
Copy: "Long & Strong (L&S) is quarterly, 52 page black and white magazine by serious throwers, for serious throwers."

Response: I looked at the name of the site and the leggy chick in the picture and I'm all like, "YEAH!  There's finally porn on Facebook!"

But then I end up at some site for like, that stuff they do at the Olympics or whatever, and I'm like "No."  No.

Product: Bulwark Flame-resistant outerwear

Copy: "Like Bulwark Protective Apparel on Facebook to get updates from the FR industry leader"

Response: Couldn't tell what the product was from the ad, so I checked their Web site.  I was disappointed to find that this  company doesn't make thongs or open-toed sandals. No sale!

Product: A well-advertised frozen pizza which now includes breadsticks.

Gist of the copy: "Fool your friends into thinking you ordered delivery pizza by buying this frozen pizza."

Response: Of course, the real questions here is "Do I even WANT the kind of friends who could be fooled by frozen pizza?" and, at a deeper level "Do I want to be the sort of friend who would do that?"  And I find that, for me at least, the answer to both questions is "No."

Product: Mark Lakers for Governor

Copy: "Mark Lakers plans to grow Nebraska's economy 20% in 4 years. Its time we elect a business Democrat and toss out the career politican!"

Response: I can't legally vote in Nebraska, so I don't have to care. But would I vote for someone who couldn't remain in politics for very long without falling victim to his own criticism of people who do so?  No.  I don't think part-timers or people who can't commit are good for this position, and I'd hate to start this fellow on a path to becoming something he disdains.  Don't want it on my conscience.  Also--IT'S is short for IT IS.