You need to get out more

Here’s a fun party behavior:
  • Pronounce or explain something in a way that is totally wrong in a barely-plausible way.
    (EG: Hagrid’s half-Sasquatch lineage IS CANON; If we’re going to go back to calling things by their original names, everything named “Washington” should be called “Hertburn;” Your aunt’s friend lost 45 lbs. in a month by eating more barium; Tom Verlaine has eaten half a regular-sized tube of Sensodyne toothpaste every day since 1974, but they changed the formula, and THAT’s why the last good thing he did was “Glitter in Their Eyes” on “Gung-Ho.”)

  • Someone will correct you
  • Then someone else will correct that person (you may need to repeat what the first person said loud enough to get attention).
  • After that, everyone should quickly go all comments-on-the-1nterhenets. Lots of name-calling and fun.  Everyone gets their phone out, because that’s where they keep the truth.
  • Use the distraction as cover while you eat all the shrimp/steal the good beer/plastic-wrap the toilet seat.
  • Get the heck out of there. Why were you even there?

    Inspired by the most recent brilliance of XKCD.

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